![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/ic5ycvvjfgm.jpg)
2.“怎么在晚上打车啊”
“滴滴打的打的呗”
“说就说呗,咋还唱上了”
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/grp5atuurob.jpg)
3. 儿子问妈妈:蜡烛的火苗为何一牽一窜的,就不能消停一下吗?妈妈说:因为这是精神小伙
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/02i2ay0cuni.jpg)
4. 我放屁这么大声是因为我穿了叭裤
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/xf0r5l3ovas.jpg)
5. 小红:你吃过鼻屎吗?小明:谁吃那咸咸的玩意
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/yyvgphyfnzq.jpg)
6. 同公园大爷在下象棋,小伙子对大爷说:“大爷你车没了。”大爷说:“没文化了吧,这叫j。”
小伙子说:“大爷你电动门没了”
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/0tzfabuycro.jpg)
7. 我的爸爸是一个执着的人,他有一次骑自行车,我坐在后面,叫卡到轮子里了,他坐着蹬不动,就站起来蹬,我着急说:“爸,别蹬了…”我爸爸说:“没事,爸有劲儿!
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/00frnfv4sjy.jpg)
8. 小时候我肠胃不好经常放屁,有一天晚上在奶奶家睡觉,突然放了个三四秒左右的屁,然后奶奶和我说,快去开门,你二叔骑着摩托车回来了
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/fc25wrzciwo.jpg)
9. 一天我看见一个老爷爷拎了好多东西,我想上去帮忙,想说,老爷爷,我帮你拎东西吧,可是非常激动,一不小心就说成了老东西,爷爷帮你拎。
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/0vvjaywnniv.jpg)
10. 前段时间去相亲,女孩跟照片一样好看,我们聊的很开心,突然女孩害羞的说,叔叔,你儿子还没来吗?
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/uiegplaks51.jpg)
11. 奶奶养了十年的狗死了,很伤心。为了安慰奶奶,我不知怎么想的,夜里开始汪汪汪地学起狗叫来。后来奶奶找人对我进行了驱魔仪式⋯
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/v5tpf23gjmw.jpg)
12. 花木兰替父从军,有一天她很想念妈妈,就在营帐里用针在布上绣出妈妈的模样,一个士兵见了就对花木兰说:秀你妈呢?
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/cfosbcoqkhy.jpg)
13. 一日,老公上了飞机,就赶紧给老婆发了一条短信说:老婆,我登机了。不一会就收到老婆的短信:“吾皇万岁万岁万万岁”
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/pidnlzbee1u.jpg)
14. 林更新的弟弟叫林缓存,妹妹林安装,姐姐林下载
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/jm311x3k5o5.jpg)
15. 今天想吃泡芙,但是发现它压扁了,妈妈说不能吃,因为他是扁芙
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/yk3ezpsvbar.jpg)
16.“我做错了什么要来到这个学校?”
“你做错了题”
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/qacbrfa2ere.jpg)
17. 喜欢是藏不住的,即使躲在衣柜里,也会被它的老公发现
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/hn2o5kscm03.jpg)
18. 去找地方吃午饭朋友正巧尿急,然后他看到一家有厕所,就大步走了进去,在众多食客中指着厕所说了句:“这有厕所,咱在这吃。
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/wsjzp2bdm1q.jpg)
19. 保安日记:3月20日,晴,养望你
对我说“宝,早安”
而不是 “早,保安”
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/jj5hfnmttln.jpg)
20. 心情不好,准备删几个微商,让他们知道创业的路也不是一帆风顺的
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/y51vaoygqmq.jpg)
21. 长得胖都不敢国红色围巾,怕自己变得像QQ
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/z1dvqsmw1uu.jpg)
22. 我们有一次上英语课,英语老师读范文,课堂挺安静的,等读到和Hi~Siri很像的句子然后接着往下读的时候突然教室里飘出来一句:我听不懂你在说什么
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/jcoxmae1srl.jpg)
23. 校长说去年大扫除是高一的同学,今年轮到高二的了
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/fivqtredba3.jpg)
24. 老师:“小鱼啊,你这次考试成绩这么好,老实说!你抄谁的?”小鱼:“老师,我抄蚌的”,老师:“你棒个屁!”
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/zqjoart1ewq.jpg)
25. 刚刷到抖音,博主写毛笔字可丑了,一条评论说:来跟我干烧烤吧!我看你抹酱还行
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/tgvtyhsk0lb.jpg)
26. 一天我正在吃饭,突然灯灭了,原来是停电了。我想着先把饭吃完,就猛扒拉了两口饭,突灯就亮了。这难道就是扒拉拉能量吗?
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/o5ddjgctscl.jpg)
27. 小红和小明每天相约学校的小树林碰头,后来一起碰成了脑震荡
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/smf3mm4lak1.jpg)
28. 有一个美国人尿急,于是变成了姜国
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/ob1ane5idvn.jpg)
29. 杀马特强子去世了,他妈妈白发人送赤橙黄绿青蓝紫发人
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/iauwv4w45es.jpg)
30. 有一只变色龙,在过斑马线的时候,累死了
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/3ubu1nk3ysw.jpg)
31. 那年他背井离乡,从此村里人再也没有喝上一口井水
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/m2s0covyys2.jpg)
32. 小红和小明坠人爱河,全村的人都来打捞
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/jrhqya3mkxr.jpg)
33. 唐僧初遇猪人戒那一天,唐僧说:八戒你跑两圈给力师看看。猪八戒跑完后问:师傅你是想测测我的体力吗?唐僧答:为师出家多年从没吃过猪肉,就想看看猪跑
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/w042yjjducf.jpg)
34. 小明吃了麻婆豆腐,被麻婆一刀捅死
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/k3b3yna2skl.jpg)
35. 心狠手辣的我,舔了一下自己的手指,然后就被辣哭了
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/0h13jmiaegi.jpg)
36. 他买着夺门而出,从此家里没有了门
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/up52i3svrhq.jpg)
37. “儿子,回家吃饭不?” 我说马上回来,结果听到电话那头我妈对我爸说:“老公,那剩饭先别喂狗了,儿子要回家吃饭”
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/m0uwosccrz4.jpg)
38. 有一天小猪做了个梦,梦到自己变成了一个水手,小猪妈妈说:“孩子,梦都是反的。”果然,小猪长大后,它变成了火腿
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/z1iyif24xdt.jpg)
39. 东市买骏马,西市买鞍鞣,南市买辔头,北市买长鞭。将军:本兰,你是女扮男装吧?木兰:卧槽你怎么发现的?将军:直男是不会为了买这点东西连逛四个集市的
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/tfnrgepppn4.jpg)
40. 带男朋友去露天的舞场跳舞,他不会跳就坐在旁边凳子上嗑瓜子,后来一个女生向他走去,伸手邀请他跳舞,我亲眼看到那个蠢蛋给了那个女的一把瓜子
![](https://www.qiushile.com/data/attachment/portal/202304/21/rdzsyurqsmp.jpg)
这就是我翻空收藏夹找到的超搞笑笑话了,喜欢的可以给我点赞留言,我也会持续为大家更新呀~